PERVERT IN THE ROOM (OH NO...OH GODS!)
(B. Pangyatoy)
NOTE: I did not write this song. Bonga insisted that I post this absolutely bold drivel on to my Lodestone. I smashed him into a corner after this. Fair play to him being inspired by "Big One In The Room" to extend the lyrics a couple stanzas but this is certainly not what I meant!
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(He is here, the one, the only Pervert In The Room!)
I'm in the room,
The Pervert In The Room,
Yes, I'm a Lalafell
And I will bring your doom.
I am shifty as can be
While I drink Ishgardian tea.
I'm awash in seas of gil
And I got a craven's will.
I don't do this work for fame
But so that you know my name.
I'm transparent, so you see,
Go ahead, make mock of me!
I'm a naughty Lalafell that sings a naughty tune.
A potato known as the Pervert In The Room!
(Bing bang boom! Perv in the Room!
Get get get out of the room!)
Last night I caught
You with my eagle eyes.
You did some ERPing in the shade.
Twas no surprise!
Did you think you would escape
With your clothes so out of shape?
You're a fool to think you would
But don't worry, is all good!
See, I let the loving flow.
And you knew. I told you so.
I'm transparent, so you see,
You ain't seen the best of me!
I'm a naughty Lalafell that sings a naughty tune.
A potato known as the Pervert In The Room!
(Bing bang boom! Perv in the Room!
Get get get out of the room!)
I run around, I chase skirts on a whim.
You see me smiling at your smallclothes?
I am him!
Selling stuff is what I do
And I rough up bad guys too.
But it's silly games I play
And I'm glad to lewd your day.
Whether you're in Limsa town,
Or Kugane, I'm around!
I'm a boi that's born to tease
And I'll sink you to your knees!
I'm a naughty Lalafell that sings a naughty tune.
A potato known as the Pervert In The Room!
(Bing bang boom! Perv in the Room!
Get get get out of the room!)
I'm in the room,
The Pervert In The Room,
And I'm a Lalafell
That's bound to bring your doom.
Hide the chicks, I'm coming in.
Hide the chicks, the fun begins.
I'll be spinning up and down.
I'll be all around your town.
Better catch me if you can
Like that crude Mamool Ja man.
I'm transparent, so you see,
Now I'm done. Make me some tea!
I'm a naughty Lalafell that sings a naughty tune.
A potato known as the Pervert In The Room!
(Bing bang boom! Perv in the Room!
Get get get out of the room!)
