The youth of the Blue Planet have risen up and have vocally clamored for humane treatment of civilians, but some have taken to vandalism and looting to exact retaliation. In this, a form of the Dragonsong War has taken place and quite frankly, I want none of it. I switched back to Lalafell Plainsfolk in protest of the harsh, destructive reaction of my peers. In addition, I acquired four new mounts (one from Mog Station), a new minion, a new orchestrion roll, and two new Triple Triad Cards from the Hunt for Law.
Meanwhile, Sakura Fujima tendered in her resignation as one of my retainers late last week, in regards to tension and conflict rising in the Blue Planet. She wanted to focus on her virtual YouTuber efforts and because of this, her contract with me ended on amicable terms with an honorable discharge and a final stipend of coin before she said her formal farewell. One day later, Misstress Akari Amano of the Greenest Eyes sent a missive to me, suggesting that Miss Sophie Twilight, her wife (they were both lesbians) be given a position to succeed Miss Sakura. I said, "Some special arrangements will have to be made, given her metabolism and background. She will need to issue a meeting with me at my apartment to go over details."
A number of days later, through a portal, Sophie arrived in a special gothic dress, tights, boots, and a bottle of refrigerated blood for rehydration. "You are Miss Kahori Harukawa the White Witch, correct?" she asked.
"That is me," I said.
"My name is Sophie Twilight. I am a vampire that would like to succeed Miss Sakura as your tenth retainer." She said this with a curtsy.
"Have a seat, let's talk," I said. "My name is Kahori, this is my alternate appearance, do not let my appearance fool you, I am an adult. This is my husband, Master Bongaboi."
"Greetings, Mistress Sophie," said my husband, doing a cheezy Elezen bow. "My name is Bongaboi, and my usual form is Lalafell, so this my alternate form. She's usually the tall one and I am the small one."
"Ah, so you can change appearances at will," Sophie said.
"Yes, but though you are a vampire, you're a Hyur with abilities to do work at night," I said. "However, as a retainer that will have the job of Ninja...you will need to be able to work in conditions that have elements that you are ill-adept to such as sunlight and water."
"Dear me, why did I bother to sign up for this?" Sophie deadpanned.
"Fortunately," said Bonga, "the local alchemists in Kugane have concocted a single one-time use elixir in which you gain unreal resistance to these two elements. It also tastes like orange juice and is called ESW - Earth, Sun and Water. Here, drink."
Sophie gave the bottle a sniff. "Mmmm, smells good. I shall drink." She quaffed the whole bottle down and felt a sharp, yet pleasant sensation envelop her, triggering a loud moan. "Ohhhhh, this feels good, I feel so much stronger now..."
"The elixir gives you 9001x Water Resistance and 9001x Sunlight Resistance, meaning you can swim in open water without your vitality taking damage and battle or move in daytime hours without vitality loss. You will not be able to battle at full strength during the day, but you will get double your strength working during the night."
"Wow, thank you, both of you," Sophie said.
"Also," I said, "we don't serve blood as a drinkable consummable in Eorzea, but we have a substitute consummable that simulates it to the detail. Here."
"What is this?" asked Sophie, holding a warm cup of soup.
"Blood Bouillabaise, made with blood tomatoes from another world, the First, and Norvrandt. Try it!"
"Mmmm-hmmmmm..." She slowly drank the soup. "Oh my goodness, it does taste like the blood I am used to drinking, only better!"
"You will want to eat it with some bread or sandwiches to complete your meal, and the venture stipends you get shall cover that," Bonga noted. "Finally, you have a full set of gear, accessories and a arm. And you have all skills for Ninja learned to max level, so you are very much ready to work in the night with your daggers!"
"I look cool now," Sophie said. "Wearing this swimsuit glamour is a bit showy but I can handle it."
"Once you have no obligations to selling stuff, you can return to Miss Akari and the others before coming on back, Sophie," I said. "Congratulations, Sophie Twilight, you are now one of our retainers and are assigned to Kugane, which is the city next door to this housing district!"
"I think I have been spoiled," Sophie said, giggling. "Thank you. Is it okay if I sleep here with both of you. I am kind of far away from Akari but I won't mind." She blushed. "I...like Lalafells too."
"In that case, I will provide you with more Blood Bouillabaise and maybe some lemonade and coffee biscuits! I believe in treating all my employees like royalty, so relax and enjoy everything you see here." A kissing noise. "Eh?"
"Oh my," Bonga said.
"Kahori...I like you," Sophie said, winking.
"And I get that all the time," I replied, looking at an invisible camera filming the confessions of Sophie Twilight in the shade. "Ah, that reminds me..."
"What?" asked Sophie.
"As with all new retainers, I would like you to open this tome. With it, you will witness and relive all the adventurers I had with all my jobs and classes. My story shall be your story. Open it."
"This book?" Sophie asked. "Very well." She opened the book, and for 30 minutes, Sophie saw scenes from all my adventures, the losses, the triumphs, the good and bad, the victories and defeats and the current situations. "I have seen it all. And I am ready to do my duty." Then she collapsed while embracing me. "But first...let me sleep holding you in my arms like a dakimakura."
"This...is going to be quite an adventure," Bonga said, as he saw me fall asleep next to Sophie in the shade.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtG8-i-mNqc
